I have the sneaky suspicion that I am too old for all this Myspace stuff as it seems to be the reserve of school kids and child bothering nutjobs after watching that Panorama thing the other night. Myspace is marginally better than Facebook as it doesn't suffer from all those fucking requests to be a werewolf or a ballerina or a spoon and all those horrid people that you went to school with desperate to be your friend now, just to see what you have done with your life and find out how many kids you have (answer: none. I know how contraception works). Anyways, all those tragic messages of "Hi, do you remember me? I used to be in your maths class" etc are only met with me not knowing who the fuck they are because I spent most of my time bored by the monotony of school with my head in the Melody Maker or the NME at the back of the class, daydreaming of shagging the lead singer of whatever indie band was in vogue at the time.
I've just had about 30 emails in my inbox this morning saying "John has just hit you with a fish" and "Kelly has just thrown a statue at you". By Christ, if they did, I'd be really out for blood. Those years on the rounders team and that baseball bat I found by the side of our fridge will have finally come to some use in the real world.
